THIS CURSE
by Ceridwen Fox
Summary: Emily doesn't know how to feel about being imprinted upon. Can Sam convince her that they are ment to be together?
1. Chapter 1

**THIS CURSE**

_Disclaimer: I own nothing. Stephanie Meyer owns all the characters. This is my first Sam Emily fic as I have now gone completelty TEAM SAM. Please read and review._

**Chapter 1**

I walked up the mountain side. The bitter breeze embraced me as I ascended higher. I pulled my jacket tighter around myself, even though it was already securely fastened. I heard rustling behind me. Paws padding against the ground at an steady pace, not too far behind.

I reached the peak and looked at the view before me. It was as though I was looking at the whole world.

I didn't turn around but I knew he was standing there, now in human form.

"This is unbearable." I said. I didn't know if I was talking to myself or to him, but he answered.

"Tell me about it."

I gulped before I spoke. "Harry spoke to me again last night. He says I'm causing you too much grief." I now turned to face him. He had his hands on his hips and a sombre look on his face.

"I didn't mean for him to come to you with that. He's just trying to help me."

I sighed deeply.

"I can't be your girlfriend, Sam." He tried very hard not to react, but his eyes screamed with pain. It made my stomach twist.

"I just keep thinking about Leah. I will always think of her if I try to imagine us..."

"I can only think of you, Emily." Sam's voice was deep and serious.

"That's why Harry wants this sorted out. I'm distracting you too much from you duties as Alpha."

We stood silently for a moment. The cold wind nipping at my ears. The sun was beginning to set.

"This imprinting thing, it doesn't necessarily mean that we have to be lovers." Sam opened his mouth but I raised my hand to stop him "I know, Billy and Harry are convinced that it's about selecting the best 'mate' for the individual. But I've been trying to research this myself. No-one knows exactly why there is imprinting."

I kept a stern face as I recited this to him. I found it very difficult.

Why was this so hard? I felt so torn. I couldn't decide whether I wanted to jump right into his arms or right off the cliff side.

"I know this is something neither of us can control. I know you didn't want to hurt Leah. But she is hurting, which hurts me. I've never seen her like this. And she's so angry with me."

"Would you have me as your friend, Sam. And I'll support you anyway I can."

I extended my hand to him.

Sam's face screwed up. I wasn't sure if he'd felt that I'd insulted him or if he was just trying to make sense of the bizarre logic I had just strung together.

His face was so damned unreadable. He licked his lips has he thought it over, then he approached me. He took my extended hand and squeezed it. A warm smile lit up his face. It made me feel...I don't know...relieved somehow.

We made our way back down the mountain side. Darkness surrounded us, but I had no reason to be afraid.

Sam talked to me more openly about himself now, knowing that I had accepted everything completely.

He told me about his family, his Dad leaving, how he looked after his mother growing up. He explained how he felt the first time he _phased_, how angry he was, then how it was all revealed to him. We did discuss Leah, I could see it pained him, but this was going to be something very unavoidable. La Push was a very small reservation, and she was after all my family. She wasn't to know anything about the werewolves and the treaty.

"It would hurt her worse later in life." Sam told me. Harry had also said this, and quite frankly I don't think Harry wanted Leah involved in this, let alone with a werewolf.

Sam asked me if I was going to stay in La Push now, but I was still unsure about how to go about that. There was a lot for me to think about concerning this new _honour_ that had been bestowed upon me.

It was almost pitch black by the time we reached the bottom. Sam insisted walking me back to the Clearwaters.

"Good night, Sam." I whispered as I unlocked the front door. I felt Sam lightly brush is fingertips down the length of my arm.

"Good night, Emily." And he turned and disappeared into the night.

Leah was waiting for me in the living room. I hung up my coat, avoiding eye contact with her.

"I see your still making one heck of an effort to stay away from Sam."

"Not now, Leah." I darted into the kitchen but she followed swiftly behind.

"You said you hated him. You said he was driving you crazy. So what, he's finally warn you down?"

"Leah!" Harry appeared in the doorway "Leave Emily alone."

A look of betrayal swept across Leah's face. But I could understand how she felt. Part of me wanted to let her scream, hit, scratch me. Anything that would make her feel better. I would give my right arm to have the old Leah back.

She gave me a final death glare before stomping out the back door.

"Did you speak with Sam?" Harry said as I rummaged around the fridge looking for something to eat.

"Yeah, I think we've got an understanding now."

"You can come and talk to me, or any of the other elders for help, Emily. But you just let Sam be there for you. He needs you aswell."

"I don't think I can stay living here. It's like I'm rubbing it in Leah's face."

"Don't you worry, would you like to stay in La Push?"

"I don't know. Maybe near by, close enough but not too close if you see what I mean."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Over the next months Harry helped me find a place to rent, just on the edge of the forest.

I was looking for a job, but in the mean time I took various small jobs like baby-sitting, walking dogs and cleaning houses.

My parents helped me out with a bit of money. They had been a bit shocked at my sudden new plans to remain in La Push.

Harry helped me out with a cover story for my parents, saying I was just trying to find out what I wanted to do with my life. This wasn't an entire lie. I had completed my first year at college, but I wasn't really sure what I wanted to do after that. My parents had actually become very supportive. Good old Harry.

Sam's house was further into the woods. I would always be available to help in anyway I could. When he wasn't patrolling he would be exhausted, so I would do his grocery shopping for him, sometimes I would prepare several meals and put them in the freezer so he would always have something ready.

I thought that maybe when some of the others phased, as Harry told me they would, Sam would be able to get some more sleep. But it seemed he had to patrol even more.

Jared was the first to phase. Sam called me and asked me to get some things together at his house, also to call the tribal elders.

I heard a great commotion outside. I was about to run out and help, but was stopped in my tracks by Billy Black.

"Stay inside, Emily. This is could get real messy." Behind him I saw two enormous wolves. The bigger of the two was Sam. I had seen him in wolf form before. The smaller one was lying on the ground, pining, covering his head with his front paws.

For two weeks Sam tried to help Jared to phase back. Sam would stay in wolf form for the most part. He would be able to phase back when exhaustion took over Jared. Sometimes Billy, Harry and Old Quil would come to watch over him so that Sam could have a rest.

I did what I could for my part.

Making sure they had food, supporting further cover stories so that no-one could get suspicious.

When Jared finally did phase back Sam insisted that he stayed here until he felt he had better control.

The next to phase was Paul, and that was exhausting for everyone. I thought it would be easier for Sam as he now had Jared to help, but Paul was a nightmare! Everything was wrecked. Sam and Jared both had to keep pinning him down to stop him from destroying the whole house.

It was the howling that I found the most unbearable.

Each one had a different howl. I could tell them apart quite easily, and they would all make the most horrifying sound just before they phased back. When they understood what they had become. It would make my very soul shudder.

Sam would always thank me profusely when the situation was under control. I never felt that I actually helped very much.

"Just you being here is a great help."

It was funny. Sam would always have the most serious expression on his face, but every now and then I'd see a little sparkle in his eye.

I came over one Sunday afternoon with a load of shopping. The boys ate like starved animals. I had a lot of baking things stored at Sam's place as well as mine, so there would always be something at hand. It was way more cost effective that way.

I started putting things away in the cupboards when I heard a noise behind me. It made me jump. Spinning around I saw that it was Sam. He must have just woken up.

"Sorry." He said, reaching for me. He looked as though I scared him just as much as he scared me. "I didn't mean to creep up on you."

"I'm alright. Were you out late last night?"

"Yeah, got in about eight this morning."

"Well go back to bed then. You'll pass out in the middle of the woods one day, and I'm not gonna come and drag your ass back to the reservation in the middle of the night."

Sam chuckled.

I went back to putting the shopping away.

"So...how was your night?"

"Probably worse than yours. I was watching the Crowe twins, the most hyper active kids in Washington, and they would just not go to sleep. Then their parents came back two hours late, I had to really twist their arms to get them to pay me the extra hours. Then they asked me if I could do a full weekend so that they can go away for their anniversary."

"Are you gonna do it?"

"I don't know. I need the money."

"You shouldn't do it if you don't want to. I don't like seeing you like this."

I didn't realise that it had happened but Sam now had his arm around me. It felt nice.

He started to rub my shoulder with his other hand. It was like I was falling under a spell. I didn't want to move away from him.

I didn't dare look up into his eyes. I kept my gaze on the floor, but stopped what I was doing, so that I could just enjoy his touch.

"It's not that bad really. They're just kids."

I felt Sam nudge the side of my head with his nose, turning me to look up at him. I was helpless to resist.

He lifted his hand to gentle bring my face around, gazing into my eyes with such longing. And slowly, he brought his lips to mine.

It was the sweetest, softest kiss I had ever had. It was very brief but it felt like an eternity had passed when I finally pulled away.

I touched my lips with my hands as I backed away as far as I could, which wasn't actually very far. I had my back right up against the counter.

Sam looked as though I had kicked him in the gut. I was about to apologize but he beat me to it.

"I'm so sorry, Emily."

"It's okay, Sam. It's okay." again I refused to meet his eyes. I started for the door but he put his arm out to stop me.

"Please don't leave." He begged. Almost desperately.

I took a deep breath. "You know we can't do this."

Then his tone changed. He had a more determined edge to his voice now.

"Why? Why can't we be together, Emily?"

"Leah..."

"We've done everything we can for LEAH! She will get over it. She will remember me as possibly the worst boyfriend she ever had, but it would be worse for her if she was with me."

"She will always be a part of my life, Sam. Everyone says that she can't be involved, but she's been affected by this as much as I have." I felt as though I had just referred to Sam as a disease, and I think that's how he heard it. The pain was back in his eyes.

"I'm not a monster, Emily. I hate myself for this, but I can't control it. And I don't want to anymore. I love you more than anything. I need you." He tried to put his arms around me but I shrugged away.

"Do you feel absolutely nothing for me?" he glared.

"Yes, I admit I feel something for you but it would be very wrong for us to be together."

"If it wasn't for Leah...would you consider me?"

I felt a tear escape my eye. Sam lifted his hand to cup my face. He brushed the tear away with his thumb and stepped closer towards me.

"She's a part of me." I whispered. I felt like I was making the most pitiful effort to resolve this situation. My stomach was in knots.

Sam now had both hands on my face. They were so warm. I felt so safe here, with him. I desperately wanted to surrender to his touch, but I shook myself free and ran out of his house.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Leah was outside my house, arms folded across her chest. I ran to her, as I felt that the only reason she would be here was if it was an absolute emergency. Or perhaps...maybe...she's forgiven me?

No. The look on her face wasn't forgiving at all. She looked as though she could kill me.

"Nice house. Surprised you didn't move straight in with him though." That stopped me dead in my tracks.

I sighed, I was too exhausted for this. "What have you come for, Leah?"

Her face became a scowl.

"I wanna hear it. I wanna hear it from you. If you ever cared about me like you swear blindly that you do then you will tell me the truth."

I stopped dead in my tracks and looked at her. She was angry, hurt and bitter. Who could blame her. And we'll never be like we were.

"Are you in love with him?!" She said sharply.

"I've tried not to be." I started "I'm trying so hard not to be. But it's agony..."

"Agony??!" She screeched back at me "What the hell do you think I've been feeling? Since he broke up with me...no before then, since he disappeared. He was completely different when he came back." here words softened "But I still loved him."

Looking at her broke my heart.

"What can I do, Leah? Please, I don't want to loose you."

"I want him! I need him!" Leah barked. It made me jump.

"You don't love him like I do." She spat at me. "I choose him over you. I want you to leave so that

we can fix what you destroyed."

I wanted to tell Leah everything. She deserved to have all the answers, but I couldn't give them too her.

"I don't wanna leave, Leah. I want things back the way they were."

"I want things back to the way they were before you were here!"

With that she turned on her heel and stormed away.

I felt crushed. This wasn't fare. I couldn't loose her, and I hated her being unhappy. I couldn't stand what this had done to her. She means more to me than him, and even if she never forgives me I can't make it worse for her by being with Sam. I was going to be the strong one this time. I was going to settle this thing once and for all. I will never see Sam Uley again.

The next time I saw Sam I was going to tell him straight.

This was going to hurt. But I had to do it. I tried to remember all the anger I felt when I first met him, when he broke up with Leah. How it aggravated me every time he magically appeared on the exact street I had to walk on.

Then I remembered how he would follow me home from a distance, to make sure I got there safely. I remembered how he phoned none stop until I agreed to meet him. I remember how he used to give Harry notes to pass on to me. I had to stop thinking then because I would stop feeling angry.

I was walking through the forest near La Push, going over the last argument with Leah in my head,when Sam appeared.

A soft, sweet smile grew across his lips as he saw me approach.

I took a deep breath.

"Sam, this has to stop now."

He looked at me completely baffled.

I ran my fingers through my hair, trying to keep it together. Why was this hurting so much?

"What Emily? What has to stop?"

"This...nonsense Sam. It's causing so much hurt can't you see that?!"

"Did Leah yell at you again?" His smile disappeared. I'm sure he'd bring it back in a minuet to try and melt my heart.

"Don't change the subject."

"This isn't fair on any of us Sam! I can't spend the rest of my life looking at Leah, being completely tortured, whilst we're feeling what we're feeling towards each other."

"What we feel for each other is stronger than anything else on earth!" still no sign of a smile, just sheer determination. Why won't he just give up?

"You said we could be friends if nothing else! I'll stop trying to make you be my girlfriend Emily, but I need you here. I can't do this without you."

"Don't you care that you're hurting Leah? You promised her everything. She's still in love with you."

"Of course I care. Emily, I'm not some kind of monstrous bastard. I did love hurt. I love her still and will hate myself forever for what I did to her. But what I feel for you is so much stronger." his voice had changed. He was starting to choke on his words. "It hurts not to be near you. I feel like I'm gonna go insane if I don't see you, or hear your voice for any length of time."

I was tearing up inside, but I had to do this. I know I could do this. I closed my eyes and took a breath.

"Well suck it up. How can you lead your precious wolf pack if your having to concentrate on me so much?"

"Emily!" He snarled now. He had never been like this before with me. But I wasn't giving up.

"What, what about me? What am I supposed to do with this imprinting crap? What about what I want. I've got training to do. I want to travel and explore the world. I'm not even twenty yet and you want me to give that all up so we can spend eternity just staring into each others eyes?

That's what Leah wants, take her!"

"What do you want!" he screamed "Name it, and I'll do it."

"Forget about me, I'm gone, we're never gonna see each other again!"

There was what seemed like an explosion all around me. I felt a searing pain, all down the side of my body. I tried to see what was going on but my body wouldn't listen to me. It hurt so much.

But the worst of it was the sound. An ear piercing sound, worse than any of the bloodcurdling howl I had heard from any of the boys. It was the sound of complete agony. And I didn't realise until it was over that that sound came from two creatures. A heart broken wolf, and me.

I woke up, I don't know how many days later, in hospital, my whole right side aching and stinging.

I was scarred for life, the doctor told me. My parents would sniff back tears when looking at me. Others would avoid making eye contact with me, even Seth my little cousin.

A bear attack had been the decided cover story. I wasn't entirely sure who was on the need to know rota so I just continued to tell everybody the same.

When I saw my own reflection for the first time, I became angry. At first I was angry with Sam, even though I knew this wasn't his fault. And with the elders and this stupid, stupid curse. I was furious.

I felt as though Fate had one last cruel trick up it's sleeve, punishing me for not sticking to the rules.

Well, two can play at that game. I thought how could I use this horrific turn of events to my advantage. Perhaps I wouldn't have to do much.

I hated feeling this way. So angry, and miserable.

Sam wouldn't want me now, any way you looked at it. He'd feel guilty about what he'd done, or just wouldn't be able to stand the sight of me.

Maybe that's why he hadn't come begging my forgiveness like I feared he would. He hadn't been at the hospital the entire time I was there.

The sight of my face may have lifted the curse.

I knew it was going to be that way for the rest of my life. But it also opened up another path for me. The man that would truly love me, undeniable, would be able to look past these scars. They would love me for who I really was. None of this ridiculous imprinting.

That thought made me feel a little better, but I still felt like a miserable wreck.

Harry came to see me one evening.

"Emily, Sam didn't choose to have this happen to him. None of the boys did. And there will be more. More young, happy, innocent boys, completely oblivious to the monsters lurking in the shadows. Right now, they're just going about their lives, unaware of their birthright as protectors. They will phase, they will change, they will become bitter and angry perhaps. But it is what they are destined to become. Leah, unfortunately, has become caught in the crossfire."

He stopped for a moment, and took my hand.

"Did you know Sam was planning to go to college? He did very well in school, impressed everybody, no-one thought he'd ever make it. He had plans, just like you."

I sighed a deep gloomy sigh.

"I will talk to him." I said weakly.

I was allowed to go home a few days later. My parents wanted me to go back with them, but I felt as though that was an impossibility now.

I couldn't go back to the life that I had before coming to La Push. I had changed, and I didn't know if it had been for the better.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

That night, as I was getting ready for bed I heard the most horrible sound. A wolf howl. Sam's howl. But it sounded strained, weak and tortured.

Then there was a bang at the door.

"Emily!" cried Jared "We need your help. It's Sam, we can't calm him down."

We raced through the forest, the sounds of straggled snarling and howling getting more distinct.

"He's been a mess since that day he hurt you. Completely uncontrollable, we have to follow him everywhere. We can usually talk him out of it, but this time he just won't listen."

When we reached the clearing, Paul was in his human form.

Jared stopped to a hault, he took my hand and pulled me behind his body, protectively.

"I thought you were gonna stay in wolf form to try to calm him."

"It's no use." Said Paul, nursing an already healing wound on his arm. "He can't think straight. He just keeps playing it over and over again in his head. I couldn't bare it, I had to phase back. He won't attack us in human form."

Billy Black and Uncle Harry were nearby but a safe distance away muttering and mumbling to each other.

I stepped closer, still by Jared's side.

I peered over his shoulder and my heart sank at what I saw.

There was Sam, in wolf form, snarling at the others. He was surrounded by blood. I looked closely and could see that his legs were covered with bite marks. His bite marks. What had he done to himself?

"It's no good Sam. You are designed to survive." Uncle Harry said, firmly but softly.

"Sam, please phase back." Said Billy

His growling was so haunting. I wanted to cover my ears, but I was frozen to the spot.

Then Sam's eyes locked with mine. His growls turned into an agonized pine.

We stared at each other, lost in each other's gaze.

I don't know what happened then, but everything seemed the calm.

I found myself drifting towards him, not even blinking.

Jared took a step forward, but Harry raised a hand to stop him.

I held my damaged hand out towards Sam's muzzle, and he lifted his head to touch it.

I knelt now, so that we could be as close as possible to each other.

My heart eased. We looked deep into each others eyes.

That's when it finally happened. That's when everything clicked into place. I wanted Sam, there was never going to be anybody else.

Our breathing matched, breath for breath. Our heart thumped, beat for beat.

I stoked the side of his face with my hand.

"Sam, please phase back. I need you to help take care of me. And, I'll take care of you." I said, stroking his front legs.

He pressed his strong head to mine. We both shut our eyes, our souls finally giving in to each other.

I felt his form change in my arms, but didn't open my eyes. I listened to the change from a wolfs' tired panting becoming a mans heavy breaths. He sighed loudly once his transformation was complete.

Jared and Paul rushed to us.

"It's okay, Sam, we're just gonna sort you out." Jared said as they both got Sam back into his cut off slacks.

Harry and Billy kept their distance.

Jared and Paul backed away. Sam, still breathing deeply, managed to open his eyes. He looked at my face.

He lifted his hand slowly, as if it weighed twenty tonnes, and brushed his fingers over my ruined face.

"Oh, Emily...I'm so sorry."

We looked right into each others eyes. Just as we had the day we met. The day he both fell helplessly in love with each other. I knew it now. This wasn't nonsense. This wasn't a cruel curse.

This was the most beautiful gift that our ancestors had decided to bless us with. And we must treasure it.

"Will you ever forgive me?" He said through tear strained eyes.

I didn't say anything. I brushed his short hair with my hand, and kissed him softly.

"Lets get you guys home." Jared stepped in. He and Paul helped Sam to his feet. The wounds on his hands had started to heal, but he still seemed ever so weak. Paul lifted one of Sam's arms over his shoulder to assist him walk. Jared was going to take the other arm, but Sam would not let go of my hand.

"I'll take him Jared." I said softly. Jared just smiled back at me and followed behind. Paul took most of the weight but I supported him up as much as I could.

Then as we walked past the elders my Uncle Harry looked at me "It's all gonna work out fine Emily. You and Sam are meant to be together. You'll grow strong from each other. Apart, as you can see, you are both completely lost and hollow."

That was the truth. I did feel whole with Sam. Just feeling him near to me made me feel stronger.

Jared and Paul came with us back to Sam's house.

"We'll patrol tonight, Sam. It's about time you had a night off anyway." Paul said as they left.

We sat curled up in each other's arms for ages. I could see the sun setting through the windows.

We were sitting in practical darkness now.

There were still tears in his eyes, every time he blinked they would spill down his face and land on my shirt.

Sam squeezed me gently in his arms.

"Ya know what you said earlier, about spending eternity just looking into each others eyes." He said turning his head to look at me.

"Sam." I started, remembering my attack on him.

"I didn't mean all those awful things I said. I thought I did at the time...but now...everything just seems...so..."

"Much clearer?" He finished for me. He gently ran his thumb over the scars on my face.

"I don't want you to be afraid of me, Emily. The thought of loosing you was just too much for me to bare." He shuddered a little but stopped himself. He looked at me to see my reaction, afraid I would run. But I didn't even flinch. I knew he wouldn't hurt me now. He was going to protect me and I was going to protect him.

"I can't think of any way I'd rather spend eternity, then looking in your eyes." Those where the last words he whispered to me before we both drifted off to sleep in each others arms.

**THE END**


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